#55 LIMPING ALONG
Jane Phinney: God has used my physical liabilities to reveal spiritual Truth. Nothing is wasted with Him.
LIMPING ALONG
Earlier this summer, I found myself the recipient of an unexpected encounter with the sidewalk. Falling is one of my fears & I was down before I even realized what was happening. We accompanied visiting friends to a nearby town known for their burgers, antique store, & resale shops. Steve & I exited one store, ahead of the group, when it happened. Without warning, I was going down fast & hard, 1-2-3…right knee-right hip-right shoulder. We were stunned! How did this happen? I had been walking with my cane in my left hand & my right hand snuggled in the crook of his arm. Apparently, the front of my sandal caught the uneven edge between the concrete sections. S-P-L-A-T! That hurt!
Thankfully, I wore jeans that day & a three-quarter-sleeved shirt, both of which protected me from bleeding scrapes. I didn’t hit my head & there was space for me to maneuver my normal roll to get upright…a learned solution to my drop foot dilemma. Out of the blue, a gal was at my side wanting to help me up before Steve could even respond. (I was just thankful he hadn’t fallen with me!) In retrospect, we concluded that she had to have been trained. As I explained my usual method, to her, for getting up off the “floor,” she squatted slightly, braced herself, & held her hand open & stiff, to become my stability & my support, never once flinching as I gingerly leaned in & slowly got my sore body upright. I’ve never seen anything like it!! I don’t know…it wouldn’t surprise me if she was a special “on duty” angel. She questioned me & made sure I was ok. Then I slowly made my way to the next store & found a soft padded chair.
I have had seasons of limping in my life. Born breech & literally folded in half (My poor mother!), I limped until my Grandma Grace took me to a chiropractor when I was 3 years old…without telling my parents. Apparently, I had a dislocated hip from the birthing process. From that point on, I was an active, outdoor girl with lots of normal scrapes, falls, & sprains. But an exercise injury at age 26, worked together with unknown arthritis in my hips, & resulted in a host of problems. Limping was my physical indicator that my mid-section was “whacked.” Fast forward 20 years & I found myself as the youngest dual hip replacement in Arizona at that time. For the most part, after those surgeries, my pain was gone & I could stand up straight. My limping days were over…or so I thought. Ten years later, drop foot descended like a “bomb out of the blue”, the result of a 2-minute electrical back spasm. It was one of the most painful things I’ve ever experienced, including childbirth. When it was over, I couldn’t feel my foot.
God has used my physical liabilities to reveal spiritual Truth. Nothing is wasted with Him. Limping makes me feel vulnerable. Tripping happens more easily to me than to someone with a normal gait. I kid you not! The simplest thing can make me trip. As a result, my body lives “on guard,” as my chiropractor says, always aware of protecting itself. It warns me. Oftentimes I need to employ external supports, like a brace or a cane or hanging on to someone’s arm. If not using those, I have no choice but to move intentionally slower. We sometimes take things for granted…until we lose them… people included. Initially, I struggled with the frustration of being physically left behind. No one likes feeling out of the mix. But it happens, even when people who know me forget. It was hard to hear one of my grands say, “Oma can’t do that anymore.” New boundary lines were automatically drawn. The grass seemed greener on the other side of the fence. But then, I realized that my limitations are someone else’s green grass. In truth, we all need help in one way or another.
In I Kings 18, the story is recorded about the time that Jezebel destroyed the prophets of the Lord. In response, Elijah gathered Israel at Mount Carmel along with 850 false prophets… 450 prophets of Baal & 400 prophets of the Asherah… who “eat at Jezebel’s table.” In his opening statement, Elijah strongly admonishes them for their contradictory lifestyle. “How long will you hesitate between two opinions? If the Lord is God, follow Him; but if Baal, follow him. But the people did not answer him a word.” (vs 21) Get this! The literal meaning of hesitate is “to limp on two divided opinions.” When faced with this heavy admonition, the people were silent. Silence is an answer. It was then that Elijah forced the issue & proved God’s supremacy. Wow! (Read the powerful account in Chapters 18 & 19) Sometimes we need a serious wakeup call to get off the fence, to stop limping along, to stop ignoring the truth in life’s situations. I don’t think there’s anything more dangerous, spiritually, than hesitating. It’s an open door for the enemy to leave us living with regrets.
When teaching our daughters to drive, Steve used to say, “He who hesitates dies.” Though referring to second-guessing in the middle of an intersection, it fits spiritually too. Hesitating can kill you, physically, in a car. Hesitating spiritually is second-guessing God. A divided mind cannot make clear, unbiased decisions. A divided mind gives audience to the enemy of your soul, your “Jezebel,” so to speak, picking & choosing the parts of Truth that serve your purposes. The inner turmoil can eventually blind your eyes, plug your ears, & squelch your voice. Being wishy-washy takes a toll. You are alive in your body but complacent & dead in your soul. James calls it “being a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways.” (1:8) Again, the literal meaning of double-minded is doubting & hesitating.
You cannot count on double-minded people. They change their minds like the weather. On any given day, you don’t quite know what you’ll get. Unlike our Faithful Father, people can be fickle. They not only bend under pressure but are often completely uprooted. And they do not stand the test of time. You have likely witnessed this dynamic at some point. You know this to be true because you either see this limping pattern in your own life, or you have experienced the effects of someone else’s spiritual hesitation. Both are deadly. There are no perfect people. But we have a Perfect God who uses imperfect people, with a singular mindset, those who live their personal relationship with Christ Jesus. The bottom line? You can count on them because ultimately, they count on Him.
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