#13 NEHEMIAH | Men of Action

Dr. Stephen Phinney: Wake up, men! It's time to take a stand and grow into the leaders God has called you to be. Seek out a Christ-as-Life mentor!

MEN | LET GO OF MAMA’S SKIRT

In the Bible, men of action and those who procrastinate are often contrasted in terms of their effectiveness and faithfulness.

Listen to the IM Leadership podcast version:

Proverbs 12:24 (ESV) states, "The hand of the diligent will rule, while the slothful will be put to forced labor."

This verse highlights the reward of diligence and the consequences of laziness. Men of action, like the diligent, are praised for their initiative, hard work, and timely efforts, leading to success and leadership.

On the other hand, those who procrastinate, likened to the slothful, are warned of the pitfalls of delay and inactivity.

Proverbs 24:33-34 (ESV) warns, "A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest, and poverty will come upon you like a robber, and want like an armed man."

This passage emphasizes the danger of procrastination, leading to unfulfilled potential and missed opportunities, while leaving their leaders look like irresponsible failures.

In the spirit of Nehemiah, who passionately sought the restoration of Jerusalem, he might have addressed the irresponsible men of Jerusalem with a call to action like this:

"Men of Jerusalem, heed my words. The walls of our beloved city lie in ruins, and the gates are but ashes. How long will you stand idle, neglecting the work entrusted to us by the Lord? The time has come to cast aside complacency and rise with renewed determination. Strengthen your hands, support the leaders that guide you, for this good work, for it is not merely bricks and mortar we rebuild, but the very soul of God the Father’s great city. Let us unite in purpose, obey our leaders, seek the Lord's guidance, and restore Jerusalem to its former glory. Our legacy depends on the actions we take today; let us not falter in our duty to God and our people."

I have learned that no matter how dynamic and powerful a Biblical leader is, most men default to laziness, procrastination, and pulling back from immovable leaders like Nehemiah.

Despite the inspiring vision and tireless dedication exhibited by such leaders, it often takes relentless effort to rally the hearts and minds of those who prefer comfort, emotional babysitting, and inaction.

Today, most men are like boys searching for meaning and purpose!

Recognizing this tendency has deepened my appreciation for the steadfastness and resilience required to lead effectively, especially in the face of widespread apathy. It is a reminder that true leadership involves not only setting an example but also persistently encouraging and challenging others to rise above their passive inclinations and embrace the collective mission, spiritual empowerment, and dedication imparted to authentic leaders - by God Himself.

Men, it is time to say good-bye to your mommy!

I have been a counselor to leaders worldwide for over 40 years. A common denominator I have found in all the passive type leaders is refusing to let go of their mother’s skirt. Here is what that means:

I have learned that men who refuse to let go of their mommies find themselves bound to the dominance of women, whether it be their mothers, wives, girlfriends, or lovers. This dependency often stifles their personal growth and autonomy, as they remain tethered to the expectations and influence of these women. It is crucial for men to cultivate independence and self-reliance, while depending on a mentor or fellow leader to guide them, allowing themselves to develop their own identity and take responsibility for their lives, family, ministry, and nation. Only by recognizing and addressing this dependency can men break free from these constraints and establish healthier, more balanced relationships.

OBEDIENCE COMES THROUGH LOYALTY

In discipling men, I have come to understand that men can only break free from their mommies’ skirt by shifting to a dependent relationship with a spiritual father figure, like Nehemiah. Embracing the guidance and wisdom of a strong, Christ-as-Life mentor can help men develop their own identity, build resilience, and grow in their indwelling faith. By looking up to a spiritual leader who exemplifies integrity, courage, and dedication to God's work, men can learn to navigate life's challenges with confidence and purpose. This shift in dependency inspires personal growth and a deeper connection to their faith, ultimately leading to a more balanced and fulfilling life.

I have observed that men who had a poor or non-existent relationship with their fathers often grow up to be rebellious, frequently procrastinating when it comes to listening to spiritual mentors.

The absence of a strong paternal figure in their formative years can leave a void that is difficult to fill, leading to a resistance against authority and guidance. This can manifest in a reluctance to embrace the wisdom and counsel of spiritual mentors, further hindering their personal and spiritual growth - resulting in turning their women into leaders to guide them.

Recognizing this pattern has deepened my understanding of the importance of positive fatherly influences and the crucial role spiritual mentors play in providing the direction and support needed for passive men to overcome these challenges.

How is a Nehemiah type leader accomplishing this?

Well, do the same thing Nehemiah did - threaten to take away either their women, or their ability to prosper.

In our pursuit of prosperity, it is easy for men to become fixated on material wealth and success. However, God often uses these very aspirations to capture our attention and redirect the focus of most men. When men place their sense of worth and achievement in financial success, God may intervene by threatening to take away their ability to prosper.

This divine disruption serves as a wake-up call, a spanking of sorts, reminding men that true fulfillment and purpose cannot be found in money and women alone. Instead, it is an invitation to turn our hearts back to God, his ordained leaders, His mission, and collective obedience as men. In this way, money & the lust of female dominance, becomes an unexpected preacher, urging of us men to seek a deeper, more meaningful relationship with Yeshua, who lives within these ordained leaders.

I can only imagine the chaos and delay that would have ensued if the lazy leaders of Nehemiah's time had refused to listen to him.

The vision and determination that Nehemiah brought to the rebuilding of Jerusalem were pivotal in completing the task in just 52 days. Without the cooperation and commitment of those he led, the project could have dragged on indefinitely, leaving the city vulnerable and its people disheartened.

The refusal to heed Nehemiah's guidance would have not only stalled the physical reconstruction but also dampened the spiritual and leadership renewal that came with it. It serves as a powerful reminder of the importance of collective leadership obedience, diligence, and responsiveness to the leadership God empowered Nehemiah to demonstrate.

Wake up, men! It's time to take a stand and grow into the leaders God has called you to be. Seek out a Christ-as-Life mentor who can guide you in your spiritual journey and make the decision to mature beyond your dependence on your mother's influence.

Embrace your role as a leader within God's community, working in full partnership with other men to advance His kingdom. Together, we can build a stronger, more faithful body of believers, united in purpose and driven by the leadership and power of Yeshua.

What are you waiting for? Time is running out. Make a stand today!